I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
