if you like me you must not know who I am
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
