I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
