CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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