you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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