And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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