i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
