Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
