Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
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There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
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and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0