everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
