Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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