ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize