Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
