Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Randomize
