I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
tell me about the fingering
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