Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
