Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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