Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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