Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.