Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(407): View more from Florida

in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(407): in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead. http://tfl.nu/kxwf

Replies (15) Good night (2772) Bad night (649)
Favorite
(617): View more from Massachusetts

quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(617): quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate http://tfl.nu/fqo5

Replies (32) Good night (7847) Bad night (615)
Favorite
(269): View more from Michigan

So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow

(1-269): View more from Michigan

Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(269): So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow (1-269): Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10 http://tfl.nu/n472

Replies (63) Good night (15070) Bad night (870)
Favorite
(410): View more from Maryland

She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(410): She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else. http://tfl.nu/yur0

Replies (47) Good night (12933) Bad night (887)
Favorite
(850): View more from Florida

I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(850): I don't remember much but I know I looked hot. http://tfl.nu/1lsd

Replies (19) Good night (5874) Bad night (977)
Favorite
(330): View more from Ohio

Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(330): Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you. http://tfl.nu/fmxs

Replies (38) Good night (7807) Bad night (1408)
Favorite
(641): View more from Iowa

Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(641): Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in. http://tfl.nu/co4b

Replies (16) Good night (4099) Bad night (1031)
Favorite
(708): View more from Illinois

We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(708): We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever. http://tfl.nu/e0m4

Replies (16) Good night (4513) Bad night (820)
Favorite
(423): View more from Tennessee

Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(423): Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this. http://tfl.nu/rnqg

Replies (12) Good night (2751) Bad night (719)
Favorite
(563): View more from Iowa

I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(563): I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished. http://tfl.nu/1qri

Replies (10) Good night (5354) Bad night (807)
Favorite
(941): View more from Florida

I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(941): I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting http://tfl.nu/c2bq

Replies (5) Good night (1115) Bad night (616)
Favorite
(406): View more from Montana

I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(406): I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price. http://tfl.nu/xxnk

Replies (8) Good night (3138) Bad night (407)
Favorite
(940): View more from Texas

I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(940): I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex. http://tfl.nu/o4rj

Replies (11) Good night (1268) Bad night (361)
Favorite
(250): View more from British Columbia

Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(250): Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults. http://tfl.nu/wfm3

Replies (6) Good night (1390) Bad night (323)
Favorite
(347): View more from New York

She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(347): She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina. http://tfl.nu/bvik

Replies (2) Good night (345) Bad night (466)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: