Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.

  (773): View more from Illinois

  SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person

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  (773) i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst. (773)SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person http://tfl.nu/tfn0
  Replies (11) Good night (2059) Bad night (3145)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.

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  (816): I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins. http://tfl.nu/76g5
  Replies (8) Good night (3093) Bad night (607)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.

  (513): View more from Ohio

  She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.

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  (513): Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen. (1-513): She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do. (513): She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses. http://tfl.nu/52u6
  Replies (35) Good night (1571) Bad night (5080)
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  (916): View more from California

  I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.

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  (916): I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry. http://tfl.nu/7tx6
  Replies (5) Good night (3499) Bad night (851)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.

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  (216): The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first. http://tfl.nu/lmqj
  Replies (8) Good night (2090) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.

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  (515): IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard. http://tfl.nu/ob2l
  Replies (1) Good night (1001) Bad night (1894)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.

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  (615): That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly. http://tfl.nu/01h2
  Replies (7) Good night (2035) Bad night (699)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.

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  (919): I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline. http://tfl.nu/f3bf
  Replies (14) Good night (2878) Bad night (647)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.

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  (417): I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer. http://tfl.nu/udvx
  Replies (3) Good night (1171) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!

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  (312): I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success! http://tfl.nu/tj5b
  Replies (8) Good night (1942) Bad night (671)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite

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  (416): drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite http://tfl.nu/pmot
  Replies (7) Good night (629) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.

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  (517): Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up. http://tfl.nu/ansq
  Replies (1) Good night (735) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science

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  (978): Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science http://tfl.nu/dvcx
  Replies (3) Good night (757) Bad night (433)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in

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  (978): After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in http://tfl.nu/thny
  Replies (4) Good night (534) Bad night (184)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.

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  (585): The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way. http://tfl.nu/4p5k
  Replies (4) Good night (843) Bad night (163)

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