when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
