fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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