Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
