Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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