There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
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I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
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Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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