Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
