Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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