I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Randomize