I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
