We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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