i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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