i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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