like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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