well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
