I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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