ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
