Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Randomize
