I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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