i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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