he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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