Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
