my room smells like sperm. sweet.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
