Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
he had hair everywhere except his balls
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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