You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
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then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
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Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
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