your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
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bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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