remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
