I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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