I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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