my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Randomize