12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize