I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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