nutella sex= disaster
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
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